The Last Day

We will experience that "last day" feelings many times in our lives.

The last day being single before we become one of a pair.

The last day in an apartment before making the move to your first house.

The last day of being just a couple before welcoming your first child.

Simple things like the last day of a good sale or the last day to sign up the kids for little league.

But there is no feeling quite like your kids last day of school.  The anticipation builds for what feels like months, but is really only weeks.  Every task at school revolves around the "last day". Plans are laid with the "last day" in mind.  There are parties to celebrate and celebrations to commemorate.  There are chorus concerts and orchestra concerts and the last baseball games of the season.   There are final tests and cramming of math facts.  There are half days, that let's be honest, are more like thirds of a day, with dismissal mid morning.

As the bus rolled up I could hear the cheering.  Kids were laughing and giggling with the anticipation of the upcoming summer.  Kim, the bus driver, honked her horn in a symphony of sound, celebrating herself another good year and giving the kids Popsicles as they departed one last time.  The kids got off and as the bus rolled away there were tears in my eyes as I realized this was the last day I'd have a 6th grader and a 3rd grader.  The last day I'd have a child in elementary school.  The last day of another year that went by way too fast.

Holding Hands

We went to Lake Placid over the weekend.  A spur of the moment family getaway.  After it was booked I contemplated canceling it.  It seemed like a good idea at the the time but did I really want to pack and get someone to watch the dog and put off the laundry and house cleaning... My daughter was excited at first but as the weekend drew near other opportunities for fun with her friends were lurking.  She was good about it and I could tell that there was part of her that wanted to be excited about going away with her family and part of her that wanted to be the typical tween and complain about it.  In any event, we went.

The resort was fantastic.  An indoor pool, a heated outdoor pool, fishing for the boys & shopping for the girls.  It would be hard for a kid not to have fun and still I wondered - was Julia happy to be here or did she wish she was home?  Two years ago or even a year ago I wouldn't have had a moments hesitation that she'd be completely happy to be there.  But as I navigate these emotional tween years I'm not sure about anything when it comes to Julia.

Saturday night we decided to go to the movies in the old theatre on the Main street.  Since we couldn't come to a consensus on what movie we all wanted to see, we split up-the boys went to see "The Terminator" and Julia and I opted for Disney's "Up".  We found a seat near the front and watched as several groups of kids, a lot of them Julia's age, gathered in groups.  Again I couldn't help thinking to myself  that she wished she was with her friends and not her Mom.  The lights dimmed and the movie started and then something completely unexpected happened.  She reached over and took my hand.  My soon-to-be-twelve-year-old was holding my hand in a public place.  

I was stunned.  I was shocked.  But most importantly I was unbelievably thankful.  I will cherish that time and hold onto it forever.  She is still my little girl.